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Thursday, July 19, 2012


at first i was cynically sniggering at the amount of official olympic merchandise that had suddenly sprouted to life on the shelves of my local sainsbury’s. lots of wenlocks and mandevilles, lots of household bric-a-brac with olympic rings or the awful stella mccartney reimagined union flag. not to mention the lapel pins – so many of them.
i was in total sneer mode. olympic spirit my fat spotty arse! corporate sell-out more like it.

then i saw it.

memories came flooding back and a big silly grin spread across my face.

when i was a kid i occasionally had to pay the milkman. he’d come around early on a saturday morning when my parents were still fast asleep. i’d give him the money and watch as he would take the £5 or £10 note and put it in his wallet and then with a quick open, close and open again the loose note would be snugly secured under elastic bands that kept all the notes safe.
the bloke who collected the insurance money from my mum also had one of these trick wallets. i was endlessly fascinated with them. i never knew how they worked, just that they worked like magic.

i still don’t know how they work.

i do know that among the london 2012 olympic tat that sainsbury’s is selling is an olympic ring trick wallet and i must have spent 10 minutes playing with it. the card that came with the wallet would be free and then it would be secure and then it would be free and then it would be secure. open. close. open close. open close.
when the olympics are over and the all the tat starts getting sold off cheap i do hope there are some trick wallets left, because i quite fancy one. 

it is the small things that keep me happy.

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