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Monday, June 28, 2010


it is a funny old world out there in the post employment void.
looking for work is very easy, finding something you want to (or can do) is less so.

the people at the jobcentres are not really there to help; they are just there to tick a few boxes. ask them about something and they just look at you blankly. just recently one of them mentioned to me that my local idea store (the new fancy name for a library, which means that yes you can go to a dance studio, just don't expect to find the book you are looking for) runs a weekly job club. it would have been nice of them to tell me that months ago, but i guess it is a secret.

those of you lucky enough not to have to endure the jobcentre may not know about the jobpoint machines. these allow you to see what new jobs there are. very basic technology, could easily do with a revamp, but let us not go there.
sometimes the jobs are a little surprising. mostly it is because there are job agencies who put their jobs through the job centre. so there are the occasional why on earth are you listing that 100k a year job as vp of an american hedge fund in the local jobcentre, surely there are head-hunters who deal with that.
or the time there was a call out for a nuclear safety inspector. again a fairly specialised job, i am figuring there is a database of the people who can do, even so it is nice to know i could apply for it and just doctor my cv a little bit to cover up the skills i don't have.
maybe i should apply for the job as a jihadist analyst. i reckon there might be a lot of travel involved in that one. though the one that just asks for international military analysis sounds much safer.
even the 2012 olympics have several jobs going in what strike me as key areas – the wrestling and modern pentathlon teams are looking for managers. call me stupid but you would have thought that they would have had them in place by now. guess no one loves wrestling or modern pentathlon. maybe i will give it a couple of weeks and then i will apply. after all how hard can it be?

still i was heartened to hear today that at least one man isn’t keen on giving up his job. seems fabio capello likes the job and seems keen to stay in place. can’t blame him, he only gets £6 million a year, so we know it is a labour of love. given that all the coverage of the world cup indicated that the players were calling the shots, rather than the manager (yes i am thinking about you david james and john terry) the money the manager gets is money for old rope.
so if capello goes i think i will throw my hat in the ring. i will offer to do it for less, i will guarantee we won’t do very well (it is called promise less, deliver more – though i am not sure about the delivery part) and i will be happy to let the players pick themselves.
i see it as a draw draw win lose situation.
even better it is one more off the unemployment statistics – iain duncan smith will love it.

Saturday, June 26, 2010


things are tough. times are hard. we are all in it together, all feeling the pain. share the medicine so that we can all enjoy the good times when they return.
have to love it as a story to sell us on.
it may not have gone over as easily if the world cup was not on to divert attention away from what the con/dems are doing.

ah and it is the world cup that has a little of my ire at this time.
the bbc have done their usual fine job of covering the event. 5live as a station seems to have moved to south africa en masse. mornings begin with a dose of nicky campbell reporting from the streets of south africa. aside from the accents often the vox pops from there sound pretty much like the ones we hear from here.

what is this nicky is saying? who is this nicky is talking about? why it is the mayor of london, boris johnson out for a jog in the streets of cape town. must be nice for bojo to be out there.

back home in london there are strong reports that fares on tubes, buses and trains will be rising pretty steeply. not to worry though boris is out in south africa having a bit of a jog and a big old jolly. golly it must be fun to be the mayor. (which i suppose is why ken livingstone has decided he will run for mayor – anyone want to take odds that if he doesn’t get the labour nomination he will run as an independent?)

of course while people are being told that they are going to have to make do, sacrifice, not expect pay increases bojo can have a trip to south africa. i am sure there is a good reason for it. perhaps it is to do with the olympic games in 2012, though quite what boris is going to learn is beyond me. maybe it is to do with the 2018 world cup bid, again quite what boris has to do with what will be a national event is beyond me.
i am sure that the press and public relations people can dress it up so that it looks like boris is doing something good for london. crikey think of the business he will generate.

meanwhile prices go up on transport. getting across town on the tube is pretty expensive as it stands, and it is looking like it will be getting even more expensive. not to worry though i am sure boris had a great time out at the world cup. i am sure he did a lot of business and londoners will be seeing the benefit of all his hard work.

or to quote jimmy hill: “chin chin”.

Saturday, June 19, 2010


i spend most of my time listening to the radio.
station of choice is the bbc's 5live. right now it is the stephen nolan show.
right now i am trying not to shout at it. right now i am trying not to throw it out the window.
5live is cathartic. while it is on i can vent and spleen.
bless the bbc for such a service.

Thursday, June 17, 2010

Monday, June 14, 2010


400 mps did not get their full pay for may.
i am guessing that there isn't going to be an outpouring of sympathy for them.

Sunday, June 13, 2010


going through a really really dull patch.
i have lost my mojo, it has followed my get up and go and has left the building.
time for a change.

Thursday, June 10, 2010


private eye is always full of chucklesome moments.
they had a little piece about lord mandelson who apparently contacted rebekah brooks, chief executive of news international, to comment on the fact that the sun newspaper was coming out in favour of the conservative party ahead of the election.
lord mandelson, taking a leaf out of the book of most sensible people, described the staff of the sun as, very aptly, "total cunts".
no arguing with that.
it is also further proof that mandy is still needed in politics.

well it would be except that mandy claims he called them "total chumps".
additionally mandelson has agreed to sell his memoirs to harpercollins (a murdoch owned company) and it is likely that it will be serialised in the times.

oh well so mandy isn't perfect. a flawed genius with a foul mouth, gotta love him.

Thursday, June 03, 2010