fuss

it seems that i missed history being made over the weekend. from the tone of some of the newspapers that informed me of it this was an event to compare with the parting of the red sea, the moon landing and the pulling down of the berlin wall.
what was this event?
it was the first woman football commentator on match of the day.
i confess i was a bit shocked that there hadn’t been a “live” tv commentary by a woman on british tv. still it all changed with jaqui oatley, oddly i have heard her numerous times on radio 5 live presenting reports from some of the lesser games being played that day (the important games get covered by such wonderful commentators as alan green or mike ingham) and she is ok.

what seemed strange about the stories was the implication that women just couldn’t commentate on a football match. obviously that is just hogwash, women are just as capable as men to commentate on football matches for games shown on tv. after all how hard can it be? what does a commentator have to do?

well a commentator has to be able to talk, and talk constantly for a fair stretch of time. we all know women can do that.
a commentator has to know lots of useless facts and have a perfect ability to work those titbits of information into the flow of the conversation. anyone who has had an argument with their girlfriend or wife knows that without a moment’s thought or hesitation they can tell you exactly where you were, what you said and what you were wearing five years ago.
a commentator has to be opinionated. need i say more?
finally a commentator is generally someone who may love the sport but has never performed at a very high level in the sport. it is mostly this that gives the commentators opinion their weight because instead of playing the game they have been students of the game. the corollary of not being a practioner of the sport means the commentator can speak with a similar voice of the armchair fan. as currently women are excluding from playing at the highest levels they can easily fulfil this requirement of a commentators cv. (it must be noted at this point that ms oatley was a keen player of the sport until she damaged her knee.

even though jaqui oatley can easily match all the required skills needed there still appeared to be a bit of a fuss over her doing the job (one is tempted to make a storm in a d-cup joke, but i am going to resist). there was talk that her commentary was polished up after the event as if it is a cardinal sin that she may have fluffed a line in the heat of the moment, as i am sure none of the male commentators make fools of themselves.
whenever i have heard ms oatley on radio 5 she seems to be professional and competent. so it is not the fact she doesn’t have the right skill set which created the fuss. i think there was an element of fear that the jobs for the boys might have been slightly eroded because she was now going to be doing tv football matches.
for the fan this was an encroachment of the last stronghold of maleness, no longer could they hold true to the idea that women knew nothing about football and what’s more if they could remember the names of the players they would never understand the off-side rule (but as only 34 people in the world really understand it that was never a fair argument).
no longer can a football match on tv be a haven of maleness. the walls have been breached and there will be more.

true it is not quite history making, but it is an interesting move. be thankful for small mercies in that ms oatley has not learnt her skills from watching sky sports fanzone show.