lost

i know you will find this hard to believe but there are many things i can’t do. i can’t translate latin into greek, quadratic equations leave me scratching my head, juggling while riding a unicycle is beyond me and as for splitting the atom let’s not go there. among the other things i can’t do is read a map.
yup i can’t read a map. i am the benjamin netanyahu of road maps.
normally it isn’t that much of an issue; i can muddle along and get to where i need to get to. that is occasionally my downfall.
the election is coming up fast. been looking at my local candidates, weighing up the choices. made my decision. oh hold on a minute i don’t think i registered to vote. blinking heck better check on that. ooops nope haven’t done it. no worries have a couple of days to sort it out.
first stop the local idea store to get a voter registration form. don’t have enough time to post it, so i will have to drop it off, not a worry. time to do that. form filled in. easy peasy. will drop it off in the morning. checked the map and it looks like a bit of a trek, but a good way to start the day.
form in bag. sleep.
wake up. check map again. shitaboogey but i got that wrong. it is much further away than i thought. ok check buses. the 15 gets me close, the 115 gets me a little closer, the 135 is no good. make notes as to where i need to get off and then walk to. all going to plan, but plan is going to have to change because i have to be somewhere else, will go in the afternoon.
afternoon now and time to get a move on. will pass on the first bus, too many people. get the next one. blimey timed this wrong, too many school kids going home. why do they let them out so early? why do they let them out at all?
not been this far down the commercial road for months.
check my notes as to where i need to get off. be on the lookout for cotton street. curse myself for not bringing my a-z with me.
there goes all saints dlr station.
getting there.
hold on this is canning town. too far for sure.
get off. look there is a community centre – they should be able to give me directions. they can, but they are as good as mine: “catch the 115”. hold on there is a library next door. find an a-z there. make notes. how stupid have i been? overshot by a fair bit. still just a straight walk back. back along the barking road onto the east india dock road and just try to find nutmeg lane.
what is the time? cripes getting close to 5.30 and they will be closed. pick up the pace. mmm this is an ugly part of town. oh just what i hate a road that doesn’t have a name on it. is it the one i want? no idea. look there is a security guard. he confirms it is nutmeg lane – can get to clover crescent from here. (could also go to saffron avenue, coriander avenue and oregano drive – if i wanted to. who know jamie also did town planning).
get to the town hall. hand in the voter registration just before 5.30pm. receptionist says she will mark it as if it came in at 5pm. i thanked her (didn’t bother pointing out that i have until midnight to get it in – that would have been churlish of me).
job done. relief.
let's go to canary wharf. not been there in a long while. walk? nope. catch the dlr. not been on the dlr for an age, i still love it. mmm lots of nice looking ladies. gotta love office hours. grab a coffee at canary wharf, watch the world go by. go into tesco – fancy some of their very nice pasta. look at the queue. will pass on that. jump onto the dlr that is at the platform. oh piss it is for stratford. get off at west india and wait for a bank train. there it is. homeward bound.
plan carried out. aims achieved. labour vote sorted.
if gordon brown gets in it is down to me.
i am labour and labour 2010 is my idea.