farting

i am english so i think the highest form of wit comes with a good loud fart and the social issues it causes. we have probably laughed at fart gags since before london was i mote in the eyes of the romans. the english love of toilet humour is one of the reasons why britons will never never be slaves (ok i admit that last one is maybe stretching the point...)
through countless tv comedy programmes such as benny hill and the young ones. films such as the carry on series toilet humour is one of the key characteristics of britishness.
so imagine my delight when i was watching the pink panther remake movie when there was an exceptional fart gag in it. you know it is going to happen, you know it is not going to be anything super special but by the holy see i couldn't help but laugh! (and why was it in a movie about a french policeman, perhaps as a mark of respect to joseph pujol - le petoman, the man who farted for the rue morgue audience. perhaps proving that the language of the fart is universal and that pat (that’s me) is once again talking out of the hole he should be parping from when he goes on about it being an english/ british thing…)

regardless of this internal debate i think we can all agree that farting (even in mixed company) can be quiet funny, sometimes it can be hilarious.

so you have to wonder at this particular story (thanks to emma for pointing it out to me). imagine if you will you are a teacher (ok for emma this is not hard, but for the rest of you try to imagine you are a teacher…) and try to imagine that you are teaching the little terrors that you see each day in the streets. i know i know it is cruel and unusual punishment, but someone has to do it. one of the things i always thought that teachers would have to develop fairly quickly would be a thick skin.
not all teachers develop such protection.
sue storer is suing her school for the tune of a million pound because of sex discrimination. what was the form of this discrimination? ms storer had a chair that, well it was a chair that made noises every time she moved.


“"it was very embarrassing to sit on," she said.
storer said she was constantly forced to apologize to children, parents and co-workers about the unladylike sounds emanating from her chair, but the school wouldn't replace the flatulent furniture.
she claims the school's refusal to replace her chair while providing some men with silent seats is indicative of the sexist behavior that undermined her position at work.”

emma and myself laughed at the story, and we both hoped that there was more to the case than the chair. it turns out that there was a little more to it. according to the times online ms storer, who as a deputy head of the school, believed she was being victimized because the head teacher favoured the other two deputy heads (both male) this meant that ms storer received extra work, that the head insisted that she invigilate an art exam rather than attend a final training session in order to become a head teacher, that the head had shown her a list of complaints about her work but did not tell her who had said what. ms storer said this all made her depressed and that she contemplated suicide.
but it all seems to hang on the chair.
back in 2002 new chairs had been delivered but her two male colleagues were given new silent chairs, while she was left with her flatulent chair.
ms storer resigned from her job in 2005.
now one could look at it as being one of those situations where she had decided to grin and bear it in the hope her dedication and stoicism would be rewarded with a new chair.
or if you take this statement at face value “it’s a health and safety issue for an employer to ensure you have a comfortable chair.” which could be translated as “i couldn’t be asked to do anything to resolve this problem for myself and wanted it all done for me….”
now remember there is 3 years of her being in the farting chair, if it was that difficult a situation (and remember she is a deputy head) i am sure there were many ways she could have resolved it – if she wanted to, or if it was that big an issue.

true the other issues she raised could be seen as being very serious.
she shouldn’t be penalized because she is a woman, if she was being held back because of that then the head should be held to task. but remember the incident she quotes is several years in the past.
the unnamed accusers i can see why she might be upset she is being criticized but doesn’t know who is saying what. but if her work is up to scratch then a few miserly words from members of staff shouldn’t matter (though this only holds if the head is not trying to discriminate against her in the first place…..

anyway this is a bit of a long winded way of saying that there are just times when people shouldn’t be allowed to sue for perceived slights, that before such actions can be taken both parties should be made to sit down and try to work things through.
the idea that everything can be solved by handing over a wodge of cash (that will mean there is less in the kitty for the local schools) seems to be the easy way out. really what should happen is that the problem is resolved. if the head has been discriminating then prove it and punish him.

but as the head said, “if it was an issue, i would have expected her to help herself.”

perhaps the answer to this whole shebang lies in one fact:
“dave rossiter, mrs storer’s legal representative, who is also her partner, said: “mrs storer has been mercilessly victimised, harassed and bullied.”
ah a lawyer is at the heart of it all, and no doubt he gets paid regardless of whether ms storer wins or not.

look out for ms storer to be appearing in a daytime tv ad campaign for a “no win no pay” legal company.
easy litigation another of the usa’s worst finding a home over here…….
i am sure the suffragettes are pleased the struggle has now become one of farting chairs….